chapter eight: those three little words

By this point, Aaron and I had been solidly dating for a couple of months. We had started the big sprinkler project at his home and spent a lot of our weekends doing yard work and hanging out with nieces and nephews. Being the couple without kids, we had officially become babysitters for many, and we loved it. Still love it. Summer was here so we spent time at soccer games, baseball games, and swimming at my parent's condo pool. I took a nanny job with two kiddos for the summer, but had Friday's off. I loved taking Aaron lunch at work on Friday's,  and of course his co-workers would tease us all the time.

We had gone to dinner at his mom's house one Sunday. It was a great day and when we came back,  I boldly asked Aaron if he could see us married some day. It was one of those, "Did I just say that out loud?/Gulp) moments. To my surprise, Aaron did not hesitate and said yes. That was the night I told him I loved him. I always said I would wait for him to say it first, but I couldn't take it anymore. I felt it and I said it. Aaron, however...needed some more time to say it back. Are you surprised? Again, just one more lesson in patience for Holly, and that's ok.

One Friday, I had taken lunch to Aaron and asked him what his plans were for the evening. He said he was tired and he'd like to just head home and relax. However, that only lasted a few minutes and I received a text a few minutes later asking if I'd like to go to Maddox and the Brigham City Temple.  I met Aaron at his home in Clinton. He was different. Even more affectionate than usual, and he told me I looked really pretty when I had just come from the pool with wet hair and a thrown together outfit. It was a gorgeous summer night. We went to the temple and afterwards headed to dinner.

 Aaron is always a gentleman. he carried my purse as you will see by the picture. Upon arriving at Maddox, as I was getting out of the car Aaron came around to open my door. He met me with a kiss and said, "I love you". BEST. WORDS. EVER. I kissed him back and throughout the night I kept smiling. There is no better thing in all of this world than the man you love, loving you back. I was over the moon.

chapter seven: aaron's perspective

Well, based on the fact that this is the first post to ‘our’ blog that have contributed, it is probably apparent to you by now that I do things at my own speed at to the beat of my own drum.  You should be very appreciative that Holly has done most of these posts because she ads many more details than I do.  I give you the skeleton with a little skin and she gives you a being dressed to the nines with jewelry, make-up and a sweet smelling fragrance.

Without further adieu, I will touch on a few items.  Holly has detailed things well so I may stick a bit to the peripheral.  Holly and others have asked at what point I knew Holly was the one, or when I knew I wanted to date her exclusive and sorry folks but that isn’t how I’m wired.  I much more follow a natural slow progression than some singularly defining moment. It just felt like the right time to date exclusively and with a little encouragement from Holly it felt like the right time to get engaged.  Holly encourages  me but she knows that if I get encouraged too much I tend to back away, so she does well balancing that.

Holly is beautiful, funny, sweet and smart.  What really won me over was that she treats me better than anyone else has.  The point that we started talking seriously about marriage came after General Conference weekend, which for me health-wise was awful.  I hadn’t been that sick for a while and she just patiently took care of me all weekend. I wanted to get a priesthood blessing, but before I could mention that, she was already across the street introducing herself to my bishop whom she hadn’t met before and asked him to come over.

Holly has done so many considerate things for me.  It’s hard to name them all; she irons my shirts, helps me with all kinds of projects, she made me freezer meals; overall she has been encouraging and uplifting.  When I left my mission many moon ago, the advice President Tveten gave me what that I should get along with life with school and work and that along the way pursue marriage and finding an eternal companion.  She should be someone that in her presence I do my noblest deeds and that being around her helps me want to do and be better.  Holly does that for me.

My least favorite phase in the English language is probably “in due time” and I’ve heard mentioned a few times in blessings.  It can be a frustrating phrase because in due time could be today, could be tomorrow or could be in ten years.  In reality all that phrase simply means is to be patient. In regards to dating I was promised that in due time I meet my eternal companion whom had honored the covenants that she had made with the Lord, and that we would  both choose to get married in the temple, both of which is very important to me.   Life as a bachelor has been fun, crazy, awesome and frustrating at times, but Holly was definitely worth the wait!

chapter six: patience, persisitance, and projects

February came and went and Aaron and I were going out on dates about once per week. This whole,
"Holly is home for good" thing was new to him and in a way I think the thought of him dating me exclusively scared him at first. When I was all the way across the United States it was safe right? Now...I was home. Commitment is a big thing. So, he decided to date some other people when I got home as well.

I knew that I would not get anywhere with Aaron if I pushed the issue. I was going to have to be patient. REALLY patient. Heavenly Father had a hand in this as well. He wanted me to learn something important from this relationship, and that I did. I had heard several times throughout my life that "love is patient. love is kind." I made a plan. I would not push, but I would be interested when Aaron wanted to go out. I would do nice things for him, but not be overbearing. I would wait for him to pursue me.  As much as I disliked that he was dating others, and as much as I didn't want to date others myself, I had to give him that freedom. My little brother Steven set me up with his Principal and we went out. Fun, nice guy, not Aaron. Those of you that have done the "dating other people thing" before know that eventually you start to think about one person more than the others. Luckily, that happened for both Aaron and I.

After several weeks of the dating 1-2 times per week, and dating other people, I went to Aaron's house one night. We were running to the grocery store and he told me to pull over into a car wash. He jumped out and started washing my dirty car before I could even really think about it. I didn't even notice that he snuck a towel in to dry the car. Sneaky he is. When he got back in the car he kissed me for the first time in several weeks. Did this mean he'd chosen me? Really?

While making dinner he started telling me his thoughts on this whole daring thing. And that he was grateful that I was patient and he had almost figured things out. He kissed me again and although I didn't want to get false hope, I was positive.

He started inviting me to his mom's house for family dinners and we were spending more time together. We started doing projects on the house, projects on my parents house, setting goals, etc. We probably needed to have a long talk about what all of this was, but we didn't. I didn't push, I stayed the course. Patient. Persistent. Projects.

Finally, one Sunday night in April we had returned from dinner at his mother's house and were making cookies. Aaron was fiddling with his phone and then showed me what he had been doing. He had changed his status on Facebook to, "In a relationship with Holly Harris". I did a double take and then said, "Oh, are we to that point?". He kissed me and said, "yes...we are". That was it, we were officially a couple. Relief!

chapter five: i mustache you to be my valentine

I had been home a day or two and I hadn't seen Aaron yet. Unlike Christmas, he did not pick me up from the air port. I sensed that he was a little nervous about me coming home so soon after the holidays (I am sure in his mind he was asking how would this affect his independence?), but this was about my dad...and I had to brush it off. Valentine's was kind of up in the air because I was following my own rules. The rules I have passed on to roommates, and girlfriends for the past ten years. I am not a chaser, and have always been old fashioned when it comes to dating. Either Aaron was going to call and ask me out for Valentine's or I would plan a night with my girlfriends, but under no uncertain terms was I NOT going to ask him out. I had to see if he was interested. I've always been under the impression that if a guy doesn't call, "he's just not that into you"...especially when the guys is 32.

He called (whew)....

He asked me out for Valentines (woot)..

He made me breakfast for dinner (yum)...

He made me smile (awesome).

Life in Salt Lake was going to be good.

I brought a package of treats and fake mustaches...and here are the pics! We ate with the VanBeekum's and that night Stephanie joked that she would make our wedding cake.


Now Stephanie IS making our wedding cake, and we couldn't be more excited!

However...I still didn't have this Aaron+Holly thing in the bag. Not all love stories are perfect, but we got there eventually, and in the next post I will tell you how!

chapter four: home for the holidays

So all of the previous questions were weighing on my mind when Aaron called during my layover in Dallas. He asked if he could pick me up from the airport. It was a much shorter drive for my parents, but of course I was looking forward to seeing Aaron so I accepted the offer.

Those of you who have been to the Salt Lake airport, can picture the escalators...the ride down to those awaiting your arrival. Aaron had fallen asleep so was a few minutes late...but as I came out the doors he greeted me with a huge hug and a kiss. Yep, a kiss. So I guess we are doing the "more than friends thing?" 

We arrived to my parents place and Aaron said he wanted to give me my Christmas gift. I assured him it was fine if we waited til Christmas Eve, when we had plans to see Les Miserables, but he insisted. He pulled out a bag from Morgan Jewlers, and I unwrapped the pretty box. Sitting in the box were real pearl earings. What? He got me real pearl earings for Christmas? Followed by more kisses? What's going on here? He also surprised me with a book he wanted to read together, and a 5lb. bag of cinnamon bears, my favorite! So thoughtful. Since Aaron served his mission in Norway and loves the New York Mets, I had gotten him a Mets garden gnome and a dinner to a yurt in Park City. Hardly as nice as jewlery, but I was playing it safe...cause I didn't know...you know?

A few days later we went on our date to the Viking Yurt. The most amazing date I have been on ever. Like EVER! First of all, it was a full moon that night so as we arrived in Park City, the whole ski resort was lit up by the moon, peeking through the Aspen's. I had been to Norway and stayed with Mats Jensen's family. His mother had made me a gorgeous Norwegian sweater and Aaron had purchased one on his mission. We were greeted by a huge sled complete with the Norwegian flag on the back, attached to a snow cat. So. Much. Fun. The sled pulled us up a ski run to the top of a mountain. There, was the cutest little hut looking thing lit up with Christmas lights. We walked inside and were handed a hot berry drink in a pewter cup. The six course meal was fantastic, complete with Scandinavian cheeses, sorbet served in rocks from different regions in Norway, and cardamom ice cream. So magical! If you live in or ever come to Utah, I highly recommend this experience, especially if you are a foodie!


It seemed that as the week went on we kept finding excuses to spend time together. We made dinner with friends, ate dinner with Grandma Murray,  and spent New Year's Eve eating take out and talking. Yeah...we liked each other, but there was this looming distance that we couldn't get past for some reason. Not until there was more established between us. I know what some of you are thinking...isn't this enough to go off of? But, I still wasn't willing to give up my job without a commitment.

This all made sense until this Christmas vacation. Amongst seeing Aaron, I also was seeing my family. My dad was not doing well. He had fallen several times that winter because the heart attack and medications had affected his equilibrium. My mom had been taking it day by day, and because she is so strong hadn't told me what was really happening with my dad's health. She didn't want to worry me, or any of her children for that matter. But children know. I knew something wasn't right.  I came home from one of those dates with Aaron and I asked my mom straight out. How is dad REALLY doing? She couldn't deny the fact that his health had gotten much worse. The next question from me was, "Do you need help taking care of him mom?" She reluctantly admitted she couldn't do it by herself anymore and that was it for me. I needed to come home.  I returned to Connecticut without commitment from Aaron but knowing I had to give my notice and come help my family. I didn't want to leave the Mandell's but resolved to the fact that if anything drastic happened with me dad, I wouldn't forgive myself for not spending time with him.

I returned home a few days before Valentines Day. What was to happen with Aaron and I at that point was still very much to be determined...